Tag: family

Broken Families

Things happen in life that are wrong.  Families argue, drift apart or explode in arguments and drama.  It doesn’t matter the reason – the story. What matters is that unless people can come together and talk openly and honestly, the story will not change.  At least, not for the better.

The stories we tell ourselves about our lives and our interactions with other people are simply our perspective, and our perspective will be unbalanced if we don’t have the other side of the story.  The same tale told from another person’s perspective is very likely to be different.  Families are frequently destroyed because people cannot or will not see any perspective other than their own.  And the destruction can span generations.

Unreasonable expectations

I know a person who, was deeply in love and wanted, eventually to marry his girlfriend.  He knew he was too young at 17 and that he had mountains to climb first and so they planned and prepared.  He was a committed, organised person and he knew exactly what he wanted his world to look like, but his parents decided to move to another country and were insistent that the young man abandon all his plans, and his fiancé, and go with them. 

The family argued.  The parents forbade their son to remain in the country where his life was laid out.  He had a place at university, a girlfriend he knew was a soul mate and even the opportunity of work once university was completed.  He didn’t want to give up his planned and hoped for future for the unknown, without his girlfriend, and in a new country.

The parents did everything in their power to make him go with them.  They told all their extended family not to give their son a place to stay.  They thought that without a home he would be forced to accompany them.

The son stood his ground; emancipated himself from his family. 

They didn’t listen – so they couldn’t understand

The parents didn’t take time to listen to why their son wanted to remain and just tried to bull-doze him into complying without ever explaining why.  The son, overwhelmed and distressed by his parents’ apparent disregard for what he wanted to do, walked away from his parents and his brothers and sisters.   Neither party stopped to really talk about what was in their hearts.  None of them truly listened and, as a result, there was little hope of moving forward with love and understanding.  They were each trying to impose their own desires on the other.

The parents eventually grew old and died.  The son too died, and now younger generations are left with a wound that they do not understand because they were not part of the original story. 

This rift started over 50 years ago has now reached down to affect the fourth generation.  This is a Ancestral Karmic Imbalance.  It takes different forms with each generation, but the original Energy is there – and it can be equally destructive. 

It can be righted by simply, and openly, by listening to the story – from every perspective – and then allowing the healing to take place.

Better still, when faced with a question, look at all sides and listen to all the stories. Be prepared to allow that your way may not be the best way or the only way.

Pelican

Pelican came calling a couple of years ago with information for humanity as a whole – and for us as individual aspects of that Collective.  We should be aware that when Pelican comes into our lives, we really need to have a good look at what should be reviewed in our personal life, and in our opinions about what is happening in the world around us. 

Pelican floats along, looking as if it is effortless, but under the water she is working.  Paddling.  It’s not a frantic work.  She looks confident and serene.  When she spots a fish she simply tips in her bill and scoops it up.   In our human world that means working in the NOW for what you want the future to look like, for the abundance you know should be available for everyone, for the Love and Serenity of a peaceful society; but storms do sometimes happen and if you hit those darker patches of water, you can get sucked in, becoming emotionally attached to the darkness that can be projected.  To get out of those darker waters, you need to work hard.   And you need the assistance of family.

Pelican encourages us to go deep into Self.  Often, by looking deeply at what you believe is happening in your world, and at your physical, emotional and spiritual health, you will most likely find that something in your life is out of whack; off kilter.  Something has a sense of ‘wrongness’ about it.

Pelican encourages us to observe with intent, and with patience, so that we can discover a deeper understanding of Self and a knowledge of where balance is needed.  To do this, explore your current life, where you stand in your beliefs, and feel into where in your body – which chakras – the emotions reside.  By being aware this way, you can work out what needs to be reviewed and probably in what manner.  For example, if something you do every day causes you pain in your throat, you can be pretty sure that you need to look deeper.   It may be that something about that task is uncomfortable, but you feel you can’t talk about it. Be aware that this work is not just for you as an individual, although that’s very important, but also for you as an integral part of the Collective Consciousness of Humanity.

Remember – the past is in the past and cannot be changed.  The way to travel forward is together, as family, and we should remember that to maintain unity within family, we need Trust, Dependability, Loyalty, Generosity, Humility and, occasionally, Sacrifice. 

The future you envisage when you look around you, can be achieved for the benefit of all with co-operation and an understanding that we can’t travel alone.  We need a support system.  We need family.

Pelican is about family.  The three that visited me were two adults and a youngster.  Pelican is about social responsibility, teamwork, generosity, friendliness.  With your family around you – and that can be your physical or your spiritual family – there is no need to sacrifice yourself in always helping others.  In always being the one to step up and sort things out.  Allow others to help you out.  To make things easier. 

I had three Pelicans visit with this message.  The Metatronic Numerology I AM Keyword Phrase for the number 3 is: I AM Joyful Creation.

We need to be looking towards creating the future we want with Joy in our hearts.  At the moment there are many people – Starseeds/Lightworkers included – who seem to have forgotten this.  The basic Law of Attraction.  The Energy you put out is what you will get back.  If you focus on the darker side of what is happening in the world, the darker energy is what will be there in abundance.  I’m talking about the fear, the anger, the distrust and confusion.  Even if your intention is good, that focus provides energy to the darker aspect. 

Learn to flip the narrative.  Seek the good.  Create the Joy.   Don’t feed the darkness.   Seek the Balance in doing the work you feel you need to do, but don’t put so much of your Energy into projects that suck you dry.  If the work you are doing is not joyously creative – look at how you can make it so.  And if it cannot be flipped then have a good look at where that heavy Energy is pointing.

When Pelican chooses to fly, she simply releases any fish in her bill and with a bit of a run, up she goes. There is something serene and magical about Pelican skimming over the water and landing with barely a splash to float, seemingly unworried about anything.  We need to emulate her by releasing what weighs us down.

Learn to accept the help of family and other members of your society.  Learn to relax – taking a step back helps you to see the bigger picture.  Release your Ego – this can often be the weight that stops you from working harmoniously with others.  And stops you from flying.

Think about Pelican, when you need to understand when you can safely float along and when you need to review what is holding you down. Especially, when you want to fly!

Home Alone

niklas-hamann-418782-unsplashSome days are hard.

Christmas is one of those days for me. It is a day filled with loss and aloneness.  This year was especially hard and I am disappointed in myself.

I don’t “do” Christmas and this year Spirit has guided me into understanding more about why this is.  In fact, over the last few weeks, Spirit has shown me a low-frequency Energy that I carry around with me, and have done so for most of my life.  It is such a part of me that I haven’t recognised it. It’s been bottled up so tight for so long I simply don’t see it.  I see it in others, but not in Self and that has to change.  You can’t work to better yourself, to grow, if you don’t see the very thing you need to work at.  This low-frequency Energy is Anger.  I can talk another time about how that Anger grew, about why I haven’t recognised it, but that is a tale for another day.  It is enough right now that I have recognised that emotion.  It means I can now work to heal that pain.

I am normally a glass-half-full person.  Even in the bleakest times I can usually find something to be grateful for.  I can usually see beauty in the dullest of days.  But Christmas Day?  Man that is hard.  Especially when faced with Face Book.  All those families coming together in Joy and celebration.  It’s confusing.  I am so glad and happy that others can enjoy that closeness with family but I am also deeply saddened that I don’t have family around.  Normally I can deal with it, mainly because it’s usually just another working day for me.  This year, I had no work to do.  It’s my life choices that have brought me such a Christmas Day, but this year I wallowed.

Loss comes in many forms.  I emigrated from England to Australia and in doing so, lost the family Christmases of childhood.  Australian Christmas is in the middle of summer – that is something I can’t get my head around – so many of my Christmas traditions are lost also simply because of the heat.  I could have made new traditions, but didn’t really get the chance.  My husband passed from cancer not long after we arrived in Australia and his family made it clear – and they chose to do this at Christmas, the first one after he died – that we were outsiders.  Or rather, If I am being honest (and I need to be) one member of the family made it clear we were not a part of that family.  I think the others told themselves that it was best if they left us alone in our grief.  I couldn’t get past the hurt that was done to my daughter that day and it was from this point that I decided that I wouldn’t “do” Christmas any more.  You can kid yourself that you are fooling others into believing that not ‘doing’ Christmas is a choice against commercialism (and I don’t go for the religious stuff either) but I don’t think that many folk realise that for me it is a defensive thing.  If you don’t do it, it can’t hurt.  How screwed up is that?

More loss.  This year I lost a close family member.  We have some barriers to break through and it appears that she is not prepared to talk about them, to try to fix them.  I didn’t even know they existed, at the level they obviously do for her, until early December.  And this is the trigger for my despondency, but it also where I found my bottled up Anger.  It is reflected in my daughter.  I found it in my mother a few years ago.  I remember that I’ve seen it in my grandmother – and experienced it at her hand.  And if you look closely at the one picture I have of my Great Grandmother, it’s right there in her eyes too.  I hope my daughter can break that trait.  She has the strength.

But now, it’s Boxing Day.  The day where tradition says you can return unwanted gifts.  I return the gifts of loneliness and dismal introspection.  I think it may take longer to return the Anger – that is something I don’t want anymore, but it will take some work to loosen.  It was a horrible day, yesterday, but this morning I realise my glass is still half full.  I had been given the opportunity to review these losses.  Some are profound and can’t be changed, some can be worked on and hopefully overcome.  But my decision, yesterday, to wallow in that loss and anger was a choice I made.  Unknowingly, yes –  but still a choice.  Today I choose differently.

I have started the Energy work on this.  It is a Karmic Imbalance that needs to be brought back into balance.  And that is one of the reasons why I am here in this lifetime.  To balance Karmic Imbalance.  I do have help in this.  I need it.

I asked my sister to be an intermediary, and sent a letter to this hurting family member.  A bridge, I hope.  A place from which to grow a better understanding of each other.  As adults.

So I will stay away from Face Book for another day – I’m not quite ready to take Joy in other people’s happiness but I do not plan to allow another Christmas to knock me so low.  If next year it looks as if it will be a lonely day again, then I’ll do something about it.

So often we see meme’s about remembering those who are alone over Christmas.  My last 20 Christmases have been difficult, but this year I learned the depth of loneliness this day can bring.  I didn’t like myself as someone wallowing in pain.  That pain has been with me for those past 20 Christmases, but this is the first year that I have faced it.  For the next 20 Christmases I will seek ways to build new traditions.

The Knowledge of my Anger, Despondency, Aloneness – and my wallowing in such low-frequency emotions IS a gift.  A gift of deeper understanding that I can now take out into the world.

A Gift of Knowledge, given in this Era of New Beginnings and New Knowledge.  I will NOT be returning this particular Gift on this Boxing Day.  Knowledge is far too precious.  And the opportunity for New Beginnings is the best Gift of all.

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