I had a wonderful deep and meaningful conversation a little while ago with friends. Sometimes such debates will result in nothing more than joy in the talk, sometimes they send me off to research more info, sometimes the conversation just sits in a hidden corner of my mind and will jump out at me days, or even weeks later, with confirmation or an alternate view or a desire to share – such as now. Luckily for you, dear Reader, you actually get very little of my thoughts. How boring are those people who spew out every little thought every single day!!!
So, today’s “Deep and Meaningful” is about making the best of a bad situation. You know those times – we all experience them – when it feels like the end of the world is about to happen and we get so overwhelmed that we just want to hibernate. Those times when it seems like everyone is chasing you for money – and you don’t have any until pay day; when the kids seem to only know one word “Muuuuuuummmmmm”, when you miss the bus or train and you are now going to be late for work – and the Big Boss is going to be there and you just know that you’ll get overlooked now for that promotion. You know the sort of thing I’m talking about. You are human, so of course you know!!!
So what is it that makes some people just deal? Things happen and they find a way through the turmoil with barely a hair out of place? It’s preparation – and I don’t mean preparation like having the kids lunches packed the night before or making sure you have a stash of oh-my-goodness-I’ve-missed-the-bus-need-to-get-a-taxi money hidden in your bra – I’m talking about preparing your brain so that it doesn’t get all panicky and go into Fight or Flight mode where you just can’t think!!!
When something like that happens, your brain just can’t tell the difference between missing the bus and seeing a sabre-toothed tiger walking down the street. Both are fearful events even though only one of them has the potential to kill you! Your brain turns to mush, sends out panic signals, your adrenals do their thing and you get a rush of hormones flooding your body ready to get you out of the way of that tiger. And if you haven’t trained your brain to recognise those symptoms (and the fact that there isn’t a tiger) and to stop long enough to allow your logical brain to kick in and offer an alternate solution (like getting a taxi when you miss the bus) there’s your day – ruined!
There are lots of ways you can train your brain – meditation is way up there on the list, but also learning to flip your thoughts. Whenever you catch yourself having a ‘negative’ thought – flip it. Always. Find something positive, or ridiculously silly about the event. Lik when you are wondering if your butt looks too big – grab a mirror and watch yourself twerking – bet you are awesome, and even if you are not you’ll probably end up in a fit of giggles. When things start to get into overwhelm, look for the ‘lesson’ so that it doesn’t happen again – like the credit card payments for example. You missed a payment and really don’t like getting the reminder phone call and you’ve stopped answering your phone unless you know who’s on the other end. Not a comfortable situation – so brainstorm ideas about how you can make sure it doesn’t happen again.
Even though they can seem huge at the time, you can always – and I seriously mean ALWAYS – find something that is light.
I’m really short of $$ at the moment so I decided to sell a lot of stuff and that gives me lot of choices in how I view these sales:
- I’ve loved those collectables for years, I want to keep them – OR – that’s less dusting to do/ less clutter/ I never really looked at them anymore / how nice that someone new will get to enjoy them! How many times have I moaned about stuff being left all over the place!
- Why do we have to sell the rowing machine – I was planning to get back on there and lose some weight – OR – well, isn’t it nice that someone will get chance to feel fitter and healthier, because I’ve been meaning to do that for 4 years, and I do really prefer to take the dog for a walk to the doggy park – lots of doggy cuddles I wouldn’t get stuck inside on that rowing machine!
- The kids have driven me INSANE; why did I ever think I wanted kids? – OR – when they are finally asleep they are angels/ the little one just brought me a flower from the garden and my heart just melted/ they are going to be awesome, indepentant, strong adults one day
Get the picture? Go look at something in YOUR life that you moan about, or have negative thoughts about and see how easy it is to flip into a positive thought.
My washing machine got left behind last time we moved – and see the picture at the top of this blog? That’s my new washing machine! I get to experience how my grandmother did the washing. And yes, it’s hard work, but scrubbing clothes up and down that washboard is very therapeutic. I can meditate at the same time. I actually like that so much that there is a possibility I won’t rush to buy a ‘proper’ washing machine!!! Who needs a washing machine when you have elbow-grease and a washboard, warm, clean-smelling water and a far greater sense of satisfaction at a job well done than you get by throwing them in a machine and pressing the ‘on’ button!
If you practice flipping your thoughts, seeking the lighter, brighter, fun aspect of your troubles then they suddenly don’t seem so huge.
So next time you are about to spit-the-dummy or feel as if things are about to overwhelm you just stop. Draw a deep breath in; close your eyes and slowly breath out and FLIP whatever was about to rock your boat. Stuff may still go bottom-up but it won’t be so painful or scary.
And for those who follow a spiritual path and understand how the Law of Attraction works – you will find that by flipping all negative thoughts, you start to attract the positive stuff. Like me. I was going through a tough patch and had to sell stuff so I could pay the rent. Then, out of the blue I discovered an old insurance I had forgotten about and phoned up to see what the go was. And was told that I actually had TWO old insurances I could cash in. Not a lot of money, but enough to tide me over. How amazing is that!!!!
I’m off to do the laundry!